Heavenly Father Loves Me
This last week was one of the most crazy weeks I have ever had in my entire life. I had tests, loads of homework and performances all over the place. I honest to goodness had no idea how I was going to get through it. I was super stressed and to top it all off I kept thinking about some past experiences in my life that had hurt me, a lot. (Maybe sometime I will kind of explain all those more)
On Wednesday night it was especially bad. I kept thinking about this person and how much he had meant to me and how he was destroying his life now. I also kept having huge feelings of guilt about past experiences that I still haven't been able to forgive myself for despite having done the whole repentance process (Again, maybe I will kind of explain that in another post). I was extraordinarily upset and wanted a blessing (something in my church) but I felt like it would be ridiculous if I asked for one for these reasons. Ask someone to take time out of their day to give me comfort because of some boy in my past. Ya...wasn't happening. But I texted a very, very, very good friend of mine, he is basically the older brother I never had. I asked him about what qualifies you to be able to get a blessing. He called me and told me that anytime you even think about wanting a blessing, you are eligible for one. He reminded me how much my Heavenly Father loves me and cares for me and my pain. He reminded me of the Atonement and how Christ feels every pain and every hurt that I do. He showed me a scripture or two and told me to go ask for a blessing.
Well the person I would call to ask for one was busy at a choir practice at the moment so I decided I would just wait until it was over since he only had like 20 minutes left. Well not even 10 seconds after I hung up the phone with my friend I got a knock on the door. It was another good friend of mine. He had come up to rehearse a scene he and I needed to perform the next day but the moment he saw how upset I was he dropped any thoughts of rehearsing and just came into my room and talked with me and gave me a massage and was just being a good friend, despite not even knowing what the problem was, he was there, he didn't pry. And he helped me realize just how blessed I am to have come to WWCC without even knowing it. Between him and my roommate (she just got home from her class) they cheered me up and I haven't really felt too terribly down about the whole situation since.
I took that as an answer to my prayer. Heavenly Father knew what I needed and He sent it to me. He knew I needed to hear that I can ask for a blessing at anytime and I should never feel selfish asking for one and that the reason they exist is to help us. No matter how trivial the problem. But He also knew that I just needed friends around me to remind me that life is good. To remind me that I am loved and that I am worth something. I love my Heavenly Father and the Atonement and I know that He loves me and will do anything He can to help me. I just have to remember to ask and to be open to Him and His blessings.
On Wednesday night it was especially bad. I kept thinking about this person and how much he had meant to me and how he was destroying his life now. I also kept having huge feelings of guilt about past experiences that I still haven't been able to forgive myself for despite having done the whole repentance process (Again, maybe I will kind of explain that in another post). I was extraordinarily upset and wanted a blessing (something in my church) but I felt like it would be ridiculous if I asked for one for these reasons. Ask someone to take time out of their day to give me comfort because of some boy in my past. Ya...wasn't happening. But I texted a very, very, very good friend of mine, he is basically the older brother I never had. I asked him about what qualifies you to be able to get a blessing. He called me and told me that anytime you even think about wanting a blessing, you are eligible for one. He reminded me how much my Heavenly Father loves me and cares for me and my pain. He reminded me of the Atonement and how Christ feels every pain and every hurt that I do. He showed me a scripture or two and told me to go ask for a blessing.
Well the person I would call to ask for one was busy at a choir practice at the moment so I decided I would just wait until it was over since he only had like 20 minutes left. Well not even 10 seconds after I hung up the phone with my friend I got a knock on the door. It was another good friend of mine. He had come up to rehearse a scene he and I needed to perform the next day but the moment he saw how upset I was he dropped any thoughts of rehearsing and just came into my room and talked with me and gave me a massage and was just being a good friend, despite not even knowing what the problem was, he was there, he didn't pry. And he helped me realize just how blessed I am to have come to WWCC without even knowing it. Between him and my roommate (she just got home from her class) they cheered me up and I haven't really felt too terribly down about the whole situation since.
I took that as an answer to my prayer. Heavenly Father knew what I needed and He sent it to me. He knew I needed to hear that I can ask for a blessing at anytime and I should never feel selfish asking for one and that the reason they exist is to help us. No matter how trivial the problem. But He also knew that I just needed friends around me to remind me that life is good. To remind me that I am loved and that I am worth something. I love my Heavenly Father and the Atonement and I know that He loves me and will do anything He can to help me. I just have to remember to ask and to be open to Him and His blessings.
Very nice!!! :-)
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