Decisions, Decisions...
Life has this weird way of just being absolutely crazy.
Things always seem to happen all at once. Whether it's homework, meetings, big decisions, etc., it all seems to happen at once and you just see explosions and fireworks and no end to the craziness.
Well these past two and half weeks of being home again were like that. I had to do yard work, look for a car, test drive cars, drive siblings places, hang out with the people I wanted to see before I came back up to Wyoming, pack my stuff for the summer, and in different boxes pack up my fall stuff and I was just getting so stressed that I couldn't see an end to it. But now that I am at the end of that craziness and about to start a completely new one that is going to last for 2-2.5 months... I miss it. There are obviously things I could have done without, but it all ended up being a good experience that I learned more about myself, those around me and my issues with big decisions.
On Friday night, I bought a car. I was told to not pay more than 1320 for it...but bad haggler that I am ended up paying 1400. I knew the alignment was off, and that the gas gauge needed fixing and a headlight. But I was okay with that. I could easily pay for that.
Right afterwards, I was excited for about...30 seconds. Then the emotional explosion hit. I realized just how much money I had paid, and that there would be a lot more to pay after that. I had prayed with my boyfriend beforehand to help me make the right decision, but what if it wasn't? What if I hadn't listened well enough? What if I just depended too much on my boyfriend's feelings about the car instead of mine? What if I just really can't do it? Ya...mini- panic attack. I prayed afterwards for peace and comfort, and it helped. But I was still panicking inside. I had stopped crying and everything, but I was still freaking out a little internally.
Well the next day, I took it to the mechanic right when they opened and told them all this stuff I wanted done plus a tune-up and just checking it out and making sure everything was okay. When they finally called me later that day, they told me about $900 worth of repairs that it needed. Apparently there was a huge leak in the oil pan, it didn't have a muffler, the locks that needed fixing were more expensive than I thought, etc., etc., etc. I somehow managed to stay pretty calm externally and not freak out. I didn't want my last day in Utah for the summer to be one where I freaked out the entire time.
Later I biked to the movie theatre with my boyfriend to watch X-Men: First Class and the ride just filled me with a kind of peace. It helped me to forget about all the stress and I just had fun as I felt the wind in my hair, felt the bike under my hands and went with the bumps and curves of the road. I hadn't ridden a bike in a few years, but it was still fun and definitely needed. I got the exact price later that day, but didn't freak out. Hit my head against Adam's shoulder a few times, and moaned and groaned a little bit, but was all over okay.
I still don't know if this was the right decision, but I know the Lord and my family will help me get through the stress of getting a new car and having to pay for everything all at once. I am eternally grateful for the advice Adam gave me the night I bought the car. He helped me to think about some things I really needed to think about and he helped me to clarify some of those thoughts.
I don't really know what the purpose of this blog post really is, but I just felt like sharing, I have multiple other ideas I could have used for this week's post, but maybe I will do more than one this week :D
Things always seem to happen all at once. Whether it's homework, meetings, big decisions, etc., it all seems to happen at once and you just see explosions and fireworks and no end to the craziness.
Well these past two and half weeks of being home again were like that. I had to do yard work, look for a car, test drive cars, drive siblings places, hang out with the people I wanted to see before I came back up to Wyoming, pack my stuff for the summer, and in different boxes pack up my fall stuff and I was just getting so stressed that I couldn't see an end to it. But now that I am at the end of that craziness and about to start a completely new one that is going to last for 2-2.5 months... I miss it. There are obviously things I could have done without, but it all ended up being a good experience that I learned more about myself, those around me and my issues with big decisions.
On Friday night, I bought a car. I was told to not pay more than 1320 for it...but bad haggler that I am ended up paying 1400. I knew the alignment was off, and that the gas gauge needed fixing and a headlight. But I was okay with that. I could easily pay for that.
Right afterwards, I was excited for about...30 seconds. Then the emotional explosion hit. I realized just how much money I had paid, and that there would be a lot more to pay after that. I had prayed with my boyfriend beforehand to help me make the right decision, but what if it wasn't? What if I hadn't listened well enough? What if I just depended too much on my boyfriend's feelings about the car instead of mine? What if I just really can't do it? Ya...mini- panic attack. I prayed afterwards for peace and comfort, and it helped. But I was still panicking inside. I had stopped crying and everything, but I was still freaking out a little internally.
Well the next day, I took it to the mechanic right when they opened and told them all this stuff I wanted done plus a tune-up and just checking it out and making sure everything was okay. When they finally called me later that day, they told me about $900 worth of repairs that it needed. Apparently there was a huge leak in the oil pan, it didn't have a muffler, the locks that needed fixing were more expensive than I thought, etc., etc., etc. I somehow managed to stay pretty calm externally and not freak out. I didn't want my last day in Utah for the summer to be one where I freaked out the entire time.
Later I biked to the movie theatre with my boyfriend to watch X-Men: First Class and the ride just filled me with a kind of peace. It helped me to forget about all the stress and I just had fun as I felt the wind in my hair, felt the bike under my hands and went with the bumps and curves of the road. I hadn't ridden a bike in a few years, but it was still fun and definitely needed. I got the exact price later that day, but didn't freak out. Hit my head against Adam's shoulder a few times, and moaned and groaned a little bit, but was all over okay.
I still don't know if this was the right decision, but I know the Lord and my family will help me get through the stress of getting a new car and having to pay for everything all at once. I am eternally grateful for the advice Adam gave me the night I bought the car. He helped me to think about some things I really needed to think about and he helped me to clarify some of those thoughts.
I don't really know what the purpose of this blog post really is, but I just felt like sharing, I have multiple other ideas I could have used for this week's post, but maybe I will do more than one this week :D
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